Alan Rodriguez
Janel Spencer
WRT 101S
17 October 2019
Ocean
Man
When I was little I was just like
any other kid—I had reasonable fears such as monsters, spiders, etc. These
things were either not real or not very harmful, so I had nothing to worry
about. Since I was from Arizona, I only imagined the ocean was a place where
fish lived, and people went swimming occasionally. Little did I know the treacherous
and terrifying things that lie within it. At the age of about five, I went to
my grandmother’s house to meet up with my cousins and hang out. We would all go
to the one room that had a TV that wasn’t in the living room. As The night got
darker the kids show would stop playing so I left the room. I decided to go
back a little later because some of my older cousins were still in there and I
wanted to hang with them. Unbeknownst to me, they were watching one of the most
notorious horror films about the ocean, Jaws. It only took about ten minutes
for me to see this big creature that lives in the ocean attack and kill someone
on screen. I immediately left the room without saying a word. I went to the
living room trembling like I was outside in a snowstorm. My aunt had asked me, “What
movie are you guys watching?” I replied with an eerie tone, “Jaws.” She
told me that she is terrified of sharks and won’t go in the ocean because of
that movie. I had no idea that this monster was real until that moment. This
small but vivid memory led me not to only fear the ocean and sharks, but to want
to study and learn more about them.
When
I started first grade I had noticed this cool looking 3D learning book about sharks,
and I knew I had read it every day in order to know my foe. This book sparked my interests in sharks, but
It did not change my overall perception of them. I was always convinced that sharks
were man eating beasts and only wanted to cause harm to other living things. It
turned out that sharks were unique creatures and were more afraid of humans
than we are of them. I would continue to try to find books about the ocean so
that I could try to find more facts that would make me more knowledgeable or
more at ease. Sadly—nothing ever worked— I still believed that sharks feed on humans
whenever they could get the chance. During this time my family decided that we
would take a vacation trip to Rock Point. I was not too worried because I knew
that I didn’t have to go into the ocean if I didn’t want to. Then one day my
family decides that we should take a ride on the “banana boat.” My stomach immediately
dropped I wanted nothing to do with
going that far deep into the ocean. My parents kept on pushing me to try this
out, even though they knew how terrified I was of the ocean. I ended up having
to go on this terrifying experience, because they couldn’t leave me alone on the
beach. I remember getting the trembling feeling again, like when I first saw Jaws.
We ended up riding the banana boat perfectly fine, but I held on to my handle
with dear life. My dad was laughing at how relieved I was to be back on the
shore.
As I grew up, I assumed that my fear of the ocean
would go away as most fears do, but for some reason or another this would not
shake off. Growing up made me have an affinity towards the ocean. I wanted to learn
the history of ocean and what was in it before humans. I would also spend the zenith
of my summer vacations watching Shark Week rather than playing outside. I could
not stop myself from learning about the ocean, ocean and the more I learned the
more I was afraid. When I would return to school many of my friends found it odd
that I was so scared of the ocean because we live in Arizona. There is no ocean
near me for many miles. I always told my peers that I didn’t know what this fear
came from all I knew was that I would get anxious whenever I was around it.
About
eleven years later from when I first saw Jaws nothing had changed my my view of
the ocean. My dad is a highway patrol officer down in Cabo San Lucas, Mexico so
he arranged for the rest of my family to meet up with him for a vacation. I was
so excited to go this because this is a nice place in Mexico to relax from every
day struggles and be at ease. After we checked in an at the hotel my brother Michael
and I changed into our swimming shorts, grabbed some drinks, and went straight
to the beach. Michael and I were already having the vacation that we wanted. As
we sat on the sand talking and drinking, Michael decided that he wants to go swimming.
I obviously didn’t want any part of that, but my brother didn’t
take no for answer. “Come on bro, the water isn’t even that bad”, he said. I replied,
“ Hell no, I’m good right here where I can still see my feet.” We continued to jaw
back at each other until it started to turn into a real argument. It got to a
point where he had enough and decided to use physical force to get me into the
water. Although Michael maybe short in stature he is a strong individual, well
at least compared to my scrawny body. He always had this sort of napoleon complex
personality to him that brought out his brutal strength and an intense look in
his dark brown eyes. So, as he grabbed me by the shoulders and legs and cradled
me into the water, I could not fight back anymore I was already in. My heart was
pounding out of my chest and I could not feel the ground I was petrified. As
soon as my brother let go I bolted straight back to shore. I could feel my body
trembling with every paddle I took and my breath getting shorter and shorter. I
kept looking down into the water to make sure nothing was near me. Once I
finally got back I sat on the sand not saying a word to Michael. I realized right
there this phobia was going to follow me for the rest of my life.
These
life experiences made a part of the person that I am today. I learned from watching,
reading, and learning about the ocean that it is a beautiful place that needs lots
of care and protection. I know that sharks are a scary species, but they are also
a vital part of the functions of the ocean. I learned that the ocean is a whole
new domain and humans should not cause harm or try to take over what is not theirs.
I now know that fears are natural, but it does not mean that we should wish wish
the worst upon these fears.
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